What actually f*cks us up with social media

I’m taking a break from social media. I know, I know… everyone announces when they are taking a break. I think my reasoning may help you, though, as it’s the predicament a lot of us find ourselves in with social media:

This mix of obsession and absolutely loathing it.

Most of us have this secret desire to go viral on social media. If you don’t admit that there is a little part of you that wants that, I think you’re lying to yourself. We think it will make our lives and our businesses so much easier. More followers, or going viral doesn’t necessarily equate a wildly successful business, though. And quite honestly, I don’t think most of us are ready to put in the work that it takes to go viral… or the capacity you need to have to hold those kind of audience numbers.

I actually quite enjoy social media. I find it an inspiring place to explore and often get a million different ideas when I come on and see what everyone else is putting out for content. The issue lies in the fact that in the midst of that inspiration my internal voice has gotten quieter and more confused over time.

I’ve never actually taken a break from social media. I’ve taken a break from posting, but consuming content? Nope. I’ve gone a day or two here and there but for the most part I am consuming every single day. We all know the feeling when we’ve scrolled too long. When we’re mentally exhausted, have consumed too much content, yet we keep scrolling for another 10 - 30 minutes. It’s a compulsion at that point. I don’t want to keep wasting my extra time on that compulsion… so I need to do something to break it.

I am at this point in my business where I’m really clear on what I am creating. I’m honing in my messaging, my voice, my ideal client profiles, and my vision. But I find it increasingly hard to articulate it when I am constantly being fed with others people’s messages & opinions all day long. Especially when they are either close to mine OR in complete contradiction. I love that social media can be this beautifully expressive tool for so many people and their businesses. At the same time, I am finding that we’re all being told that we need to put out this ‘polarizing’, ‘authority’ content constantly. That’s the winning formula right now on social media. And I get it, you won’t make an impact with a bland view point, or if you’re not confident in what you’re saying… but it also causes people to be very matter-of-fact in their content. So we run into this situation where one person says to do it this way, this other person says this is actually the way you do it… No wonder we’re all exhausted. Our brains are taking in opposing thoughts and opinions at a rapid rate and trying to make sense of it. It’s exhausting. My brain hurts just thinking about it.

I just want to get quiet with myself for a little bit. See what clarity comes through when I don’t have any external influence. How expressive can I become? How clear do my thoughts become to share? How much less polarizing do the thoughts seem in my own head? When will I stop comparing myself to other people’s lives and opinions? That’s the inner peace I’m looking for in this. And the outcome of that is, I hope, content that is both inspiring and clear, and yet not so matter-of-fact that it causes others to become more confused upon taking it in. I want my channels to be a place where people come find more clarity and feel more connected to themselves… not a place where their thoughts become confused.

Besides the mental overwhelm, I’ve also noticed this lack of presence in my life. Like content creation is this invisible layer between my real life and social media. So much of my work is centered on vision work. What you are creating, where your brand is heading, what the vision is for your company. This is also work I do with myself constantly. Social media only exacerbates that and I live a lot of my life in a state of ‘oh that would make a good piece of content’ or ‘I wonder how I would film this for a TikTok?’. I often feel this need to capture or record pieces of my life instead of actually just fully living it. I just want a little break where everything is just for me for a period of time. Every moment, every little thing I notice around me, all the beauty. I want to be a little selfish with it for a while. Then I can consciously choose if I want to capture it or just enjoy it, instead of this compulsion to record ‘just in case’ or to ‘build my b-roll bank up’.

Overall, I just really want to be more intentional with my time, with my content, and what I am contributing through my social media channels. I don’t want it to feel like an after-thought: my content or my life. And right now, both kind of feel like the quality is suffering because of the way I am utilizing social media in my life and in my business.

So I’m doing a big ‘ol reset to re-evaluate and re-imagine what it can look like for me. I encourage you to join me if you also feel any of what I’ve shared above.

I feel like a lot of us get frustrated with marketing ourselves on social media. It’s this complex, never-ending, ever-evolving game we play. Our enemy isn’t the algorithm or everyone else posting… it’s a mental game against ourselves. Sometimes it’s effortless, even fun. I think the majority of us feel a mix of overwhelmed, inspired, exhausted and confused, though. I want to see if I can get it to a point where it is intentional, inspiring, clear & sustainable. That’s what I’m personally going for with my social media.

I’m personally excited for this challenge. I think it’s going to be really hard at first. My hope is that it becomes natural to create before consuming - and be more fully present in my life. Instead of thinking about my life as one big piece of content, I want to look at content as one small piece of my life.